Asperger and dating

After all, there are few places in society where social rules are as crucially important and deeply entrenched as in the sphere of courtship, and being mildly autistic — or having Asperger's Syndrome (AS), if you use the label as it was before the APA revised its diagnostic criteria — impairs your ability to comprehend nonverbal communication. There is more of a connection between these two things than you might think.

Diagnosis of this pervasive developmental disorder is often difficult because individuals with this condition are very intelligent.Obsessive fixation of specific topics is a glaring difference between neurotypical cognitive functioning and AS mental processing.Language development is another factor that makes Aspergers unique from the other disorders on the autism spectrum.For better or worse, there is a music to dating, and while people with AS can understand the verses (and often have a distinctly straightforward way of expressing ourselves that can be refreshing), we struggle with the pitch, rhythm, dynamics, timbre, and texture. There is a great quote by Bertrand Russell that helps illustrate what I mean:"Love is something far more than desire for sexual intercourse; it is the principal means of escape from the loneliness which afflicts most men and women throughout the greater part of their lives."Thankfully having AS certainly doesn't inhibit one’s ability to desire or enjoy sexual intercourse, but the same cannot be said of cultivating the kinds of connections necessary to escape from the "existential loneliness" described by Russell.While this is partially due to the insecurity caused by disproportionately experiencing various forms of social rejection for years and years, even people with AS who received predominantly positive reinforcement in their early lives can still feel detached and isolated due to their inability to fully communicate with others.

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